i think my job is (insert f-word here) up

"If you don't want politics, join the tuition industry"
this was what i heard a few days ago from a group of girls advising their friend. just have a habit of eavesdropping they talked so loudly anyway.

so as much as I would love to teach and interact with students because they are much more sincere/caring/helpful/understanding/un-hypocritical/un-manipulative than adults i cannot because i know the gross ugliness of the education industry.
Educators (or at least educators working for this company):

1. Give in to parents' unreasonable demands.
2.Have unfair amounts of workload - as mentioned in previous posts i have a effing chao geng co-worker who continues to slack her ass off and suck up to the supervisor who laps it up
3. and said supervisor continues to live in sweet denial of the issues that are going on, refusing to delegate fair work to employees/have a meeting to clear up complaints, misunderstandings and whatnot
4. have to deal with lots of other shits like admin work, dishwashing. insect extermination, groceries buying, cooking, etc etc (OH AND DEALING WITH UNREASONABLE COMPLAINTS AND WORK POLITICS - WOW COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY?!)
5. Cannot punish students in a way we deem fit, but yet are not given guidance on how the school/MOE would like us to discipline students (wow)
6. but yet get complained about when we are trying our best, ironically by the primary school's management itself, and to make it worse from our very own employers (the ones responsible for guiding us on how to deal with all these shits in the first place)

this is really stupid, i dont know how to deal with this anymore. i enjoy teaching the kids but how to concentrate on motivating and inspiring learning when i am constantly being put down for my efforts? 当坚持像无賴
translation: when perseverance seems like shamelessness
putting in voluntary time to plan fun and educational activities for the students/thinking of discipline matters to suit the school management, the company, the government and the parents (like how is that going to be done?!) and yet must work with the students
and i know all these is not going to be acknowledged, it might even seem rude/overbearing/authoritative/bossy/WRONG/ILLEGAL etc on my part.
but who cares, i'm shameless anyway. liking people who don't like me back. talking to people who ignore me. giving people who not only don't reciprocate but don't appreciate as well birthday presents, notes, caring texts, thoughts. for what all these. for what.

it just makes me question my self-worth all the more. as long as this goes on I'll never have the mental and emotional capacity to love another human being. not even my mother. my sister. my family.

Ah fuck it.